Pauline's blog

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Hello, name's pauline.
11th april is the day,
I'm 18 this year.
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Amanda Allison Daniel Ferlin Jessica Kohser Kenji Kenny Kristle Kokheng Meilin Rachel Syndris Sophia Susanna Teresa Xinyan Xuelin Yingfong Yingyan

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Ask me anything @ Formspring

my dog worried the hell out of me just now. :(
loads of blood in her jaw. :'(

感觉到压力了。
天啊，就我。
真的找不回我对读书的兴趣，bububu.

seems like i got alot to say,& nothing to say. ;o

addiction.
"一堆灰花凌乱着，在这个时刻。
我想起斑鹃般的白鸽，甜蜜散落了
情绪摸名的拉着，我还爱你呢，
但你断断续续唱着歌，假装没事了，
时间过了，走了，爱情面临选择，
你冷了，觉得我苦了，
你开始的不快乐，你用卡片信写着，
有谁爱只给到着沉的痛了
怎么了，你累了，说好的，幸福呢，
我懂了，不说了，爱淡了，梦远了，
开心你不该信疑，一心述着你再不舍，
那些爱过的感觉都太深刻我都还记得，
你不懂了，说好的，幸福呢，
我做了，那个那，放手了，后悔了，
只是回忆那音乐和汗水转着，要怎么停呢?
怎么了，你累了，说好的，幸福呢，
我懂了，不说了，爱淡了，梦远了，
我都还记得, 你不懂了，说好的，幸福呢，
我做了，那个那，放手了，后悔了，
只是回忆那音乐和汗水转着，要怎么停呢? "

时间过了，走了，我还爱你呢
那些爱过的感觉都太深刻我都还记得，
说好的，幸福呢.

jay's new album,i don't like majority of them.lol!

好听！！ : 稻香 , 失落非主流
还不错。 : 達芬奇的畫布 , 女兒紅

got the song send me? ;p

--------------------------

why is it that whenever i met someone i haven't see in a while,
the first thing they will say is
"哎！你越来越瘦啊！“
我真的有那么瘦吗?!... :(

smile leh.

why must my hse be so far from e busstop? :(
stupid leg,
*kicks myself*

i keep 失眠-ing!!　：（
could it be that i'm used to msg-ing till i fall asleep?LOL~

爱上了一个人，
能够为他牺牲。

yes,i finally did some studying today.
one maths paper2,one poa ws,one ss source-based paper.
but i cannot feel achivement!!! :(
为何！！～

i'm going back to study now!!!!
*try and update everynow and then,
but i hope not to much.
i should spend my time studying :( *

對這個世界如果你有太多的抱怨
跌倒了就不敢繼續往前走
為什麼人要這麼的脆弱墮落

ffs ahead~

i ate my own homework ;o

what i see is books,books and more books. :(

i need to study more,more,more!

motivate me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

i'm learning not to cry on e outside anymore. :)

online study?click HERE!

blog tmr?really tired now.
need to stop using comp & blogging so much though.
i need to motivate myself :(
last post tmr before going on hiatus i guess.

my heart talk

pretty car.

i think i sprained my ankle while crossing road today.
tripped on the crub.
super dumb and had to continue walking with e pain.zzz!

每天想著你已變成習慣,一直幻想你在我身邊
我的想法很简单没有他们的复杂

it just keeps getting deeper.when is it gonna stop?

click,nice song : 深呼吸

okay,alot happened recently.
of my post dated 17 september 2008,
i was just voicing out my thoughts,
venting out my anger(?),disappointment.
i had no intention of comfronting e person,
provoking the person or spreading rumors about her.
i was even going to treat her normally.
but well,things happen.
maybe i was wrong to post such a thing in the first place.

to her :
i've alr explained things.up to you what to believe.

to him:
我承认...我还喜欢你，
but that doesn't mean i will do such extreme things .
you should know me better than that.

i seem like the bad guy now.
but really, 我问心无愧。
i did nothing wrong,i have nothing to hide.

跟自己在一起，也不错。
maybe some time away from e crowd is good.
sorry to those around me,
i'll be okay soon..

i shall fade away,till e time is right for me to shine again.

or

maybe neighbour is right...

i should smile because i deserve to.

my eyes really hurt big time,
maybe cause i've been using them for e wrong reasons this 2days.
gah,i should stop.
sleeping soon,bye.

I used to think,
I had the answers to everything.
But now I know,
Life doesn't always go my way.

lifeusedtobegood,

i'm just messing up everyone's life.
sorry. :)

8:19PM

--------------------------------

further disappointment! :(
一天比一天奪志!
feeling really sick this few days
and all i wanna do is sleep sleep & sleep more. :(
why!

&my neck is killing me.
cannot turn,pain like hell.
even when i stand up from sitting down it hurts badly. :(

don't ask me for my results,
unless you really care.
what does getting a higher score than me means?
it means nothing at all to me. :)

don't assume that's its you
& go around telling people things that ain't true.
i would gladly appreciate that.

you can go around and make everyone hate me.
i don't care,seriously.我问心无愧。

i can be alone,are you sure you can?
don't do things to yourself.

p/s to the her,stop what you're doing pls.
i just don't like you at first,
now i'm starting to hate you.

a part of me feels bad sometimes,
but,why?gah.

another part of me feels really sad & insecure.
~~why does it looks like i'm causing alot of conflicts & problems.~~
maybe it's best i stay in my own world and keep quiet.

after so much,sometimes i really like being alone.
not emo kind of alone,but just...alone.
if you get what i mean. :)

howdoifitin?

伤心！
another disapointment again! :'(
studies suck big time.
study so hard still get same stupid marks.
what for!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111
only bio & poa didn't dissapoint me much.boo.
没兴趣了咯。

奪志! :'(

eye was fugly swollen and pain.
& not feeling well too.
so no school for me today :(

futile study trip today.
i was busy chomping away on my snacks watching them study lor!gah.
杀了我吧～
真的没兴趣了！天啊！
but was fun,
being with the girls ~~really~~ almost makes me forget everything else.

best pic of me and her?LOL.

best pic of us!

then we went crazy.lol.

i like this ring!i don't mind this ring for marriage leh.LOL.

sock dress!喜欢！！but ex!

更喜欢！but 更 ex!!

i will be back for you when i'm rich!

想你的习惯

wenhao,生日快乐!!

since u're the birthday boy,i let you be taller okay! ;p

像小孩子！ ;o

認識你已經有五年！
今年要一起用功嗯！^^.

ytd went to the beach to celebrate wenhao bday.
played vball with some strangers with susu.
fun fun. ;D
left the beach and went for dinner.
i don't know where the groups photos are.
will post them when i get them!
GROUP PHOTOS!

i want to thank,
xiaolong for the drink ! ;D
teo for the doughnut! ;D
&kok heng for his jacket! ;D
very appreciated!

今天，bad school day!!
results damn dissapointing.
motivation 在哪，是什么？bububu.
results sucks big time.
gah,好累。

something wrong with my eyes and stomach today.
胃从拜五就不舒服，今天跟惨！
eye don't know what problem.
eyelid there like swollen or what,
blinking hurts alot. :(

不開心。
勇敢的走下去,回到最初的美好。
尽力.

prelim + art is over!!!
*jumps around room happily*
but Os lvl and some more art is coming!!!
*pouts*

thanks to e lack of sleep from rushing art e past two days,
felt really tired today.
painted half of my work and fell asleep in e examination.bububu.
i think it's going to affect my overall prelims results. :(
哎，算了~ 不睡也睡了。
但现在还很累很累嗯！
i'm going to sleep super early today!
*yawns* bye!~

i don't like changes.

looking for art stuff saw this.
anyone rmb what this was?haha.
nice memories. :) i miss those times.

------------------------------------

artartartartart. :(
好累哦!@.@

对读书的兴趣,

没了.

it doesn't get any worst than this.

i can't belive it!!!!!!11
#&$(*#@&$*&#(@%^&*(@)#@&%@)#(@*$^@*!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
i freaking trusted you!again & again you had backstabbed me.but again & again i've choosen to forgive you.WHY!?why the hell did i forgive you?oh yah,i THOUGHT you were worth the forgivness and you were a good friend.or i thought so.i cannot belive i was so so so stupid to belive you again and again!and to think that i poured ~~all~~ majority of my sorrows & secrets to you!now they are no longer secrets,thanks to you!i can't belive you can act so nice in front of me pretending to help me and helping me get what i wanted.instead,you went behind me and starting doing things that you told me you wouldn't do!we quarrelled about it before and i told you i didn't like what you were doing.i TOLD you!i told you i didn't like it & i thought you will take my words into consideration and maybe do some changes.but you did not!you went even further with what you were doing.wtf is wrong with you?!!even other could see that you were doing something that i didn't like and i told you multiple times before.they kindly advised you not to continue with what you were doing & may i know what you reply them?you just fucking said "I DON'T CARE." what's with that?!i seriously seriously trusted you and really really told you everything that was bothering me.what did you do?you did not encourage me at all and instead pour cold water on me every single time i turn to you.yet,i still treated you as a friend and though i'll get mad every single time you did that to me,i forgave you and continue treating you as a friend.i even once said sorry to you.wtf was i doing?!i must be blind at that point of time.i cannot belive how much i trusted you and how much you betrayed my trust!you fucking hell did what i least expected.i thought you would be on my side.nevertheless,everything proved me wrong.from words,to people,to me actually seeing/hearing it with my own eyes.you were the exact opposite of what i thought you were.you are the first person i know who is such a serious two facer!i cannot belive that i couldn't tell what you were doing.it was so damn freaking obvious!i cannot belive you!you act so nice in front of me and my friends,"lending a listening ear" (in this case you are listening to me because you wanted to tell others what you know!).is it so nice to betray my trust again and again?anyway,i doubt you have any friends at all.even all your "closest" friends have spilled some stuff about you to me.you are just treating your friend like ... i don't know.toys?throwing them away when you don't need them and when you need them,they are just a phone call away.i seriously salute those who were by you for a couple of years.i think i was not very close with you until a year back or so and i alr had so much mishaps with you.i wonder how your "friends" pull through?you are such a fucking flirt.bitch.i don't care if you know that i'm talking about you.but from now on,i'm going to keep my distance & be wary of every single word i said to you.i will not trust you ever again.you have just gone over the limit.i'm just going to treat you as a casual schoolmate from now on.fuck you.

p/s if you have done nth wrong to upset me,you have no need to worry that e person i'm talking about is you.

FRIENDS?!R.O.F.L.M.A.O.
what is it anyway?

i wanted to post this a few days back,
but didn't have the time to.

i'm not angry,
i'm dissapointed.

alr so much troubles in my head,
& out comes another one.
great!

dissapointed.

seriously i am.
知人知面不知心!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

moving on,
paper 1 today was so-so.
i didn't really do it whole heartedly.gah.
我被你弄到,我对读书没兴趣了.
went to do art & lunched with teresa later.
went to popular to get some stuff.
i realised i cannot say double sided tape (short tongue,fyi)
and that teresa nubgua keep laughing at me!!!!
and i bought suan mei that isnt suan at all!
con me!!!!!!!1
homed,gotta chiong art later.gah.
imy

我会坚强的保留着脸上的笑容。
i will try to smile.

我好烦.

好多好多的烦恼！
i don't know where to turn to.
should i cancel all my tuitions?
~~maybe that will kill all my family problems.~~

&i seem to lost my interest in studies.
~~maybe even in life too.~~

要坚强好难喔。

i'mlockedinahouse,
withnoroofovermyheadtoshieldallmytroublesaway.
mytroublesareaccumulating.
they'redrowningme.
where'sthekey?
ican'tfindit...
我会让自己假装很坚定。

pain pain go away~

很有意义的歌。要听！

"I'm sittin' here all by myself
just tryin' to think of something to do
Tryin' to think of something, anything
just to keep me from thinking of you..
But you know it's not working out
'cause you're all that's on my mind
One thought of you is all it takes
to leave the rest of the world behind
~
I'm sittin' here tryin' to convince myself
that you're not the one for me
But the more I think, the less I believe it
and the more I want you here with me

~
I look around my room and everything I see reminds me of you
Oh please, baby won't you take my hand"

listen to the song for full lyrics. :)

我嫉妒，
很嫉妒。

science practical today.
overall's pretty okay.
burnt myself pretty badly a few times.ouch.
&stomach was feeling damn pain throughout.

recently stomach 很不好。
想拉又想吐，该不会又吃错东西了吧。
no school tmr.
乘明天放假好好在家休息~ ：)

hao cute de font. ;o

要坚强。

"要坚强"
我常常对着镜子里的人大声讲。

fromflamestodust.

可以吗?

listen.

如果能在一起

--------------------------------------

okay,i shall act like i'm in a very good mood.
and do a nice post today okay?! *smiles*

i'm badly burnt.ouch.i cannot carry my bagpack.
and even my uniform is hurting my shoulders.
through the eng paper today,
i really really felt like sleeping.
but noooooooooooooooope!i'm not regretting going out ytd!

well,went to the beach with xiaoting ytd.
we reached around 11+ ? yeah.
found a spot and settled down.
she wanted to apply sunblock,
then she told me that the sunblock cannot come out.
so i said, "come,i help you."
and i gave the bottle of sunblock a good shake,
it ended up .......

hahaha,ops!
ended me "applying" for her as well.lol!
well,started playing vball.
there wasn't much sun at first lor~
halfway through,
two guys approach us and said wanna play on court.
so we said okay.

we got to know that one of them is samuel and the other alvin.
samuel's a really good setter!
& alvin's a really good joker.haha!

it was really super funny.
i was telling xiaoting,
"eh,that guy's attitude is just like alvin(tan) lor!"
then i guess they over heard or smt
and said "huh?his eng name is alvin leh."
hahahahahha,are all alvin(s) in e world e same?lol!

it's really nice playing vball with them.
very very fun. :)
they even bought drinks for us.haha,nice guys.

halfway through our game.
this taiwan guy came and join us.
he's a pretty good player too!
and the best part is!
he said next time we go taiwan,
we just have to pay for the air tickets & give him a call.
and he will pay for e rest of our expenses.hahaha!
(except shopping i guess.)
that's realy nice lor!!!!
& his girlfriend is really pretty!lol!
he even said xt & me speak chinese v.well.hahahha!
my chinese?!what a joke.lol!
he also told me vitamin c can cure crack lips!
i'm gonna eat loads of vitamin C now. ;p

he left after playing with us for a'lil well.
continued playing with samuel&alvin.
after a while,another group of ppl came and join us.
so we began playing friendly matches.
very very fun.
and e sun came out then!
i think i lost alot of calories ytd.

left the beach ard 3.30pm + .
said bye to the guys and headed to the showers.
went to vivo to get a drink.
&headed home after that.

that explains why i look so red/tan today.
overall fun day ytd. :)
(not gonna post all photos okay.)

i like my hair. ;o

this is e taiwan guy and the girl .

whoisreal?
what's there to say now?

13th 08.
今天出去玩，
想放松别想那么多。
没想到遇到的人却问了一些问题，
让我又想起...

went out today.
miracle,only ate 3 pieces of bread e whole day.
& not feeling hungry..ha.ha.ha.
meet some really nice people.

no mood to blog now...
catch e next post yeah?

preview.

你忘了吗?
i really want these two months to past fast,
or not?
没想过笑着面对会那么累，
我好怕，好怕。
但还能怎样?

昨天灯笼节 uh? hahahaha.
went home after tuition.
sis asked me to go to e lanten thingy.
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,it started raining like shit.
it stopped , walked home.
it began to pour.urghhhhhhhhhhhhh.
waited outside the door for some time.
it was freezing cold.
freaking big rain + wind.eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
school tmr!
i can't believe i stayed at home for one whole week :(

如果我說愛你,
能不能永遠相信.
想你变成一种习惯。
nights like tt,i wished u were there.

you don't know how hard it is just to keep smiling.

nicest i ever eaten!

一丝曙光

biggie tee. ;o

今天我有尽力去读书。
有一点点的收获。；D

&camwhored abit.
bad hair dayyyyyyyy.
good extensions day.lol.
今天照片都是我。忍啊。
难的 i post no fringe pictures. ;o

今天又让我看见想起你的东西，
好想念以前。
我能不能在你心里复活呢?
现在只能等。。。

eyes look weird!!but whatever.